The Right To Become A Stay At Home Mom

The Right To Become A Stay At Home Mom

I was really inspired when I read Mia Redrick’s post about a woman’s right to stay at home. It seems like the feminist movement, which was supposed to free us from the restrictions and stereotypes associated with our sex, sort of backfired and created new restrictions and stereotypes that are maybe as bad as the old ones.

 

English: One of the symbols of German Women's ...

English: One of the symbols of German Women’s movement (from the 1970s) Deutsch: Ein Logo der deutschen Frauenbewegung (aus den 70er Jahren) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

 

It’s not that I don’t value the wonderful gifts that the feminist movement has given my generation. I can’t imagine a time when it was almost impossible for women to have an education, get a job, have rights and own property. I know that there are still women all over the world who don’t enjoy the same rights. And it saddens me that these women often have to lay down their lives just so their daughters and granddaughters can enjoy the rights that I take for granted.

 

But it’s also frustrating to see how our fight for quality has also resulted in us undervaluing traditional female roles, most especially motherhood. That for some reason, when an intelligent, working woman becomes a mother and chooses to focus on being a parent, it’s a waste.

Why do we think that a woman’s talent is “wasted” when she chooses to stay at home instead of going back to work? Why do we think that a woman “isn’t working hard enough” when she chooses to spend only 8 hours at work instead of 10-12 hours? Why are we disappointed when we see women who find more joy and contentment tending to their families instead of focusing our careers? Why are we shaming these women who make these choices instead of celebrating the fact that we finally have all these choices at our disposal?

 

bookworm

A moment worth staying at home for: watching my daughter read while sitting on her throne.

The whole point of the feminist movement is to give women the freedom to choose how they want to live their lives. And that means giving value to each and every role a woman chooses to play.

We’re not just workers and citizens; we’re mothers, partners and wives. Our talents are not wasted when we leave our jobs. We don’t stop contributing to society when stop working. We help by trying to raise our children the best way we can.  We help by giving way for other women to shine in the jobs or careers that we left behind. We help by exploring new, different, and better ways to improve our skills and talents; like becoming a work at home mom.

 

I’m really happy I read this. It made me feel more confident about the choices I made in my life. And I now know how to answer the next time someone asks me, “What is a smart girl like you doing home?”

 

“Being a mom.”

cropped-Wailings-Of-A-Work-At-Home-Mom.png

 

Enhanced by Zemanta
Julia Jasmine Sta Romana
Follow me

Julia Jasmine Sta Romana

Julia Jasmine Sta Romana is a writer, content development specialist and enterprise development trainer. She likes to write about science and technology, education, parenting, food, and always looking for ways to make working at home an easier and more fulfilling experience.
Julia Jasmine Sta Romana
Follow me

6 comments for “The Right To Become A Stay At Home Mom

  1. May 8, 2013 at 5:08 am

    I totally agree with you and I have been in constant debate with pseudo feminists about the idea of being a stay at home mom or “housewife” especially because they immediately lead on with the negative connotation. If I will become a mother, I would choose to stay home and experience life with my child in motherhood rather than work my way up on corporate ladders. Besides, there are jobs I can take while staying home, thanks to the advent of professions that can be done online. I might not be able to project the same way as “big company” people do, but I will have the best days of my life with my family. Good work on this article Julia!

    • May 8, 2013 at 5:14 am

      Thank you Pearl! The work you and your sisters do are also inspiring. Proof that you don’t need to work for a corporation to create something good and worthwhile. See you guys at the workshop!

  2. May 8, 2013 at 6:54 am

    I love this blog!! I enjoy being a stay at home mom! I know it is what I was born to do regardless of what anybody says. Great read!

  3. May 8, 2013 at 10:22 am

    I just bought a book that’s tackling the very same issues you just wrote about. What caught my attention was the blurb at the back that says, “If motherhood were viewed as the full-time job it is, it would not be considered as something we could do on the side, and women would be less inclined to try to balance career and motherhood, only to discover, many stress filled years later, that it cannot be done.”

    The book was published in 2004, so it probably doesn’t take into account how today’s wired world is changing how SAHMs are able to actually accomplish work related endeavors at home, with the kids. But I agree that motherhood should be treated as the full time job that it is, and a woman who decides to prioritize taking care of her kids by staying at home shouldn’t be shamed for doing so. I love how you phrased it: “Why are we shaming these women who make these choices instead of celebrating the fact that we finally have all these choices at our disposal?” And this: “We help by giving way for other women to shine in the jobs or careers that we left behind. We help by exploring new, different, and better ways to improve our skills and talents; like becoming a work at home mom.”

    Thank you for putting this out there, truly appreciate it 🙂

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: